I'm very sick. 72 years old. I thinking I'm losing my mind. My dead friend told me it's going to be okay. I could feel him. There is more…I don't know what but more.

I just spent over the last year watching (and taking care of) my mother who had stage 4 cancer. She went through a lot of different stages. The last stage she went through, she started talking about seeing people who had passed, sometimes talking directly to them. Other times just seeing them. She carried on a completely lucid conversation with anybody until her last word so she wasn't cognitively impaired or overly medicated, her mind was very clear . Hospice gives out a book to every caregiver "your loved one may very likely start talking to or about people who have passed as if they're there. Do not assume that this person is hallucinating because chances are, they're not." I admit that I was surprised by the support for this mindset as I don't find it common. Some of what my mom has shared were dreams and some were more "this is what I saw and/or heard ".. My son's wife just lost her own mother a few weeks ago and her mom started making room on her bed for her dog, who had passed 5 years before, and she called him by name. She wasn't a woman who was into new age/psychic stuff and was not particularly religious so that seemed very out of character for her. She passed young enough that this dog might have been the only soul on the other side that she knew. I know only that this dog was very dear to her.

I don't mean to make this about me, i just want you to understand that although it's apparently very common to receive contact with deceased loved ones around the time of a person's imminent passing, by no means does such a contact always mean that you're dying and by NO means does it indicate that you're crazy.

I have a different perspective than the others who have responded. Idk anything about your illness or your prognosis so please bear that in mind when thinking about what I'm saying first here.

I have a bad reputation and need help. What should I do?

My hope for you is that you will take this as being the attempt to comfort you that I believe it is, don't doubt it or yourself but be open to the gesture of love and support that is intended.

My advice doesn't have much to do with reading the Bible, although I had a priest baptize my mom (something she had always wanted so this wasn't forced on her ) and give her last rites, and the hospice chaplain came and prayed with her as well, so I'm not anti-religion, she passed with her rosary in her hand so if this is your belief system and you find it comforting, then definitely embrace it. Regardless of that, I urge you to trust your instincts about feeling your friend around you. I worked as a hospice volunteer for several years and I'm telling you that this isn't uncommon for sane lucid people to experience .

Take care of yourself.

Hi everybody! I have been looking at posts on narcs and narc abuse on here and if has really helped me out a lot. I am currently struggling with my situation and need some advice/support. I met a narc last year, everything seemed to good to be true. Love bombing, always texting calling and taking me on dates. Everything changed when someone warned me about him out in public in front of him and who he is. This caused a conflict with us and the love bombing seized. he would tell me that everything is okay and i can come and talk. He would set a time limit on me and kick me out after that. he would then text me like everything was fine and we hung out again and after that he completely ghosted me for one week. He came back and texted me a week later laughing about the ghosting and acting like nothing had happened. he continued to text me ( not like in the beginning) make plans with me, then on the day of the plans he would just ghost me. One day he would act interested the next silence. i contacted him a month later and he acted like nothing happened. He was on a vacation and sent me a picture of another woman ( someone he allegedly met on the trip) to strike a reaction but i never gave him one. After the trip he came to my place and was extremely rude, accusing me of going on dates with a bunch of men. The next day he accused me of being an alcoholic and that he wanted nothing to do with me but said well maybe we can be "friends" then ghosted me i assumed at this point it was over and i would never hear from him again. He contacted me on the holiday a month later acting like everything was great. We ended up hanging out a month or so later and when we hung out it went well, i thought things were going in the right direction. after we hung out.. silence. I would try to text him and if he replied it would be very short then he just stopped replying. He ghosted me for almost three months. I thought he was done this time and of course he popped up again like nothing happened. At this point i was getting sick of if so i questioned him as to why he dissapeared and always does this. Of course he had some sob story about a injury and family member dying of cancer. I felt pity for him and he gave me an apology.. so i took him back stupidly. things seemed to be going smooth for a couple months, of course until his family member died and his injury got better he never contacted me and was distant. Menawhile, i was there for him during the difficult time for him. He lied to me about the funeral and never wanted to chat. I was chasing him and he would always claim nothing was wrong but when i said i thought he used me when he was down he could not handle it and would always tell me he didnt care and to go away. I would get so upset i would try texting him to work it out he would barelt respond and if he did he would not be nice about it. we did hang out a couple times after that, he would ignore me after. One day i was like hey i think you are seeing someone else, and i was like well ixam seeing someone so no problem if you are he said " buy bye good luck with your new guy stop contacting me" i was devastated and tried to get into contact with him for weeks then i just gave up and accepted it was over. He ended up contacting me a month later acting like everything was fine. He wanted to go out and have drinks i told him i would. He and i both seemed to have a great time. He ends up ignoring me again. I kept texting him trying to figure out what was wrong. He kept saying everything was fine and i said ok can we hang out again? He said maybe i was like why? He just kept saying maybe … our last conversation we had… i said what is wrong ? He said nothing is wrong everything is fine. I asked him why he keeps saying maybe. He said " maybe but i dont want to see you right now" i said why? He saix " im just not feeling it, if i wanted to date i would" i said why did you contact me less then a week ago wanting to go out? He said i didnt.. even though he did. So i said should i just move on or what? He said whatever you want to do. So i said that he was really confusing me and asked him if he had anything more to say before i move on? My messages were turning green so i panicked he blocked me and reacted irrationally. I said " omg did you block me? My messages are not going through. Even texted him on my work phone asking what was up. And called him twice ( please dont judge me i know it is pathetic i never was this type of girl before him) so he replied and said " Ok I'll block you now" then immedietly blocked me. He has never blocked me before since I have met him he will just ghost. Is this ths final discard aka " grand finale? Did i just push him too far? this has upset me so much its hard to even function.

I've had these experiences myself and I'm still here, so by no means am I trying to say that your feeling and/or seeing your friend is an indication that you're dying-although that is common, it's not necessarily why you're seeing or feeling your friend. I'm just saying that it's generally (by my experience, which is all I have to go on) during times of challenges and not necessarily always for you but sometimes for a shared love one. The one I've heard from the most BY FAR is my husband and only once was there a message pertaining to me-and it was a hell of a message, very unexpected and comforting. Every other time it was about our son, and every single time I found our son struggling in some way that I had no idea about. My mom, who is the other person very close to my son, would hear from my husband sometimes during the same time I did. These visits were not about any of us dying, they were always a heads up, drop what you are doing and check on him he's not ok. I never failed to find him in a tough struggle. One time it was between 2–3 am and I thought I was crazy, waking out of a sound sleep and texting him at that hour, but it was such a strong drive to contact him RIGHT NOW and discuss some peculiar little inconsequential incident that had happened when he was just learning to talk-it was a weird uneventful incident many years forgotten but the pull to write him at 2:30 am and share this weird little memory was overwhelming so, feeling very puzzled and awkward, i just went with it. I was stunned to get an immediate response from my son, who was sitting alone in the wee hours very upset wondering if his dad knew that he had just become a father himself-the story, while uneventful, was about a very sweet moment between my son and his dad, (without going into details I will add that it was a situation I had stumbled upon accidentally that I had never even told his dad that I had discovered-it was an incident I overheard on his baby monitor-they were upstairs and never heard me pop in on my way to a meeting, I overheard this and never told him that I had so we had never even discussed this and I had forgotten about this story decades ago) My son responded 30 seconds after I sent this message "how did you know that I was just sitting here crying and wondering if Dad knew that I have a new baby?". Sometimes the things that have come out of my mouth were completely unplanned and unexpected-it may sound strange but they didn't come from me and they always had meaning for my son. That 2;30 am story was one of those things. I'm no medium and there are maybe 5–6 people and 3 pets this has happened with-and I'm still here, so by no means am I trying to imply that you're dying.